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Fight inside

Knowing truth, whispering lies
and it hurts again – Red

We all know what’s the best for us. Not the fake best, but the real, true best. One that helps us grow, makes us better people, improves us in many ways and helps us move forward, towards fulfillment of our dreams.

Still, way too often that best is totally opposed to our current state of mind, the one that seeks and desires no change. It’s simply too comfortable with familiar environment, it will do anything to keep it that way. Even if that environment is a mud we’re less than thrilled to be in, meaning pain and misery in the long run. Sometimes it even won’t be so subtle and whisper false rationalizations to us, but will scream at us and fight us. And more often than not, it will win.

The simple act of writing this article has deep and profound meaning to me. It means this time something enormous is different. It means ­victory. I am winning – and from now on, I plan to keep on winning battles, even long after the war is over.

Today, I was almost defeated. After working on the tasks I had to, my mind wanted to take a rest. Not because I was really exhausted, but because it wanted me to take time off ­to read about others’ success, watch several more­-or­-less interesting Youtube clips or to simply despair further on the overall situation of not taking action, ever.

In the end, I almost gave in. Less than two hours before midnight I’m writing this post, making delivery. Even I have no readers yet, I am remaining accountable, staying true to my, until now unannounced promise to post an article a day.

Leo of Zenhabits wrote today ­to make a tiny move – just lace up. For me, that meant to open a writing app on my iPad mini and share the fight inside, take the load off. I can’t believe it was that hard, but after the first sentence, words came pouring. And now, the feeling is great.

I feel so much lighter and motivated, crossing my first obstacle. Let’s keep crossing them together.

Luka Pensa
21 February 2014